Through Road


Dear Eugene,

Big beautiful cars went up the hill beside me aiming for the top, a university up the mount waiting to take them to places higher still.  They were wandering yet going too fast for--in spite of--the truth: it's obvious even in low light that there is no through road.  Don't stop what you are doing; the stepping on the gas gives itself meaning, even with only a dead end in sight.  It costs no one nothing and it takes no time to turn around.  Who knows, maybe you can ram the big powerful thing through death and find life?

I took transit in my university years so the bus route is the only path I knew to get there.  Mostly I didn't pay attention anyway because I would either be studying or napping.  The path was scenic but that's an adjective I found only years after; I aimed for nothing but the classrooms then.  I like swimming but haven't used the beautiful university pools, not any, not once.  I've learned to swim only after my school years, spoiled for opportunities none too satisfying, volunteering in the day and part-time hours at night, tried hard to drown myself in between.  Someone gave me access to her private apartment pool and I made it a necessary pleasure to get baptized daily.  I still don't know my benefactor but that's another story.

You do what you need to do these are the conditions and who is to judge?  We could land ourselves that much further from grace by taking things for granted but otherwise life is a mystery in water it gives you freedom and it kills you.

Yours, Alex

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