Beyond Words

Dear Eugene,

I think I am changing.

I guess a person changes all the time, slowly and gradually.  But this is not that kind.

This is about leaving things behind for good, crossing over to the other side, saying goodbye.

I am searching for a new way to speak.  My old way of speaking can no longer account for the new me.  Not too long ago I said to myself, There are twenty million ways to say the same thing; why not try them all in your life time?  Now I am looking for the twenty million and one way, and I have not found it yet.

I wrote and threw, wrote and threw, wrote and threw.  Lately I wrote a lot to you and threw away just as much.  I am not happy with my sentences any more.  I can't find the right prepositions, how one thing relates to another.  I've tried them all: in, at, of, etc. but none of them is good enough.  None of them can fully account for what I am seeing, even if only through a glass darkly.

I volunteer as a literacy tutor.  So this is how illiterate feels like.

Beyond words, Alex

Comments

  1. TimJanuary 18, 2018 at 4:14 PM

    Don't change too much, Alex. But I do resonate with your sensation of illiteracy. Not an enjoyable place to feel caught.

    ReplyDelete

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