Loss

Dear Eugene,

Have you ever woken up in the morning and felt like you've lost something near and dear to you, that you didn't know where it is...and worst of all, you didn't even know what it is?

A sense of inexplicable loss that demands an explanation, in words but more than words.

It's like after making love being sent away with a gesture to clarify you weren't really loved after all, desperate texts firing back and forth to salvage a teenage love that is growing older by the second, shriveling into a grotesque finality shivering on the roadside that a passerby can't help but look away.

What have I lost?  Why is this loss so profound yet I don't even know what it is?


In the movie "Leaving Las Vegas," the Nicolas Cage character sold everything, checked into a motel to drink himself to death.  He read the name of the motel on a sign, "The hole you're in..."

I am missing Jesus, I know.

When we don't care about what our Father cares about, we would miss Jesus and shun the Spirit.  Hell is one slow and subtle burn.

Jesus would never wave us away and say, Well, you weren't loved after all...

We thought we were the ones waiting.  He is the one longing desperately for our next text.

Yours, Alex

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